It's hard to make it in this world, but I'm figure it out one day at a time. I think I want to create a movement, wake people up and slap them in the face. Make them realize that what they do day in and day out isn't going to make this world or their lives any better. So get on the train, there's a rocket strapped on the back and we're going to the moon, if we miss it we'll just keep on going.

Discontent is the first step in the progress of a man or a nation.

I saw a baby take its first steps yesterday at work, the parents were there too, just the four of us. It was pretty great, it made me smile. Not one of those "just being nice" smiles, a genuine one.

Hot and cold, no in between. Top of the world one minute, six feet under the next. This is how it goes, obscurity clouds me consistantly. It's ok, I know it'll all work out. I just have to stop and say 'hmmm' sometimes. I keep reality in my back pocket to remind me that my head might be in the clouds but my feet are definatly planted on the ground.

I'll be damned if my woman didn't turn me into a morning person. To think she used to be one.

I believe the love you talk about with me. Honestly, you can try to wipe the memories aside, but it's you that you unleash.

There's no place I could be without you, it's too dark to disgard the life that is you.

Honestly I love billy corgan's voice. The smashing pumpkins got me through some really tough times in my life, and has to be my all time favorite band, and his new band Zwan sounds great so far too. If I got paid to listen to and download music all day I'd be a really happy person.

I'm in a great mood today, didn't start off great, but I threw on some music and that all changed. I love how music can change my mood, make me feel great. My one true love will always be music, I don't know why I'm not trying to do something with music. Maybe I can make it my hobby, at least until I have enough money to do what I want.

Sorry for neglecting you blog, I guess I've been getting away from you lately, lost in everyone but myself. But reflection time is good. So I'll be scrawling nonsensical things in you more often.

What the fuck am I doing? I can't please anybody else... might as well worry about myself right? Well what the hell are you supposed to do when what you want is to make someone else happy? If I had all the answers I'd write them down and sell them in a book and make millions, then everyone would be happy.

Ultimately that's all that I want, to make everyone happy. Me included.

Ever get a phone call that just makes you have a bad feeling deep in the pit of your stomach? I hate those. It's not so much bad news as just wondering what's going on.

I hope everything works out.

Though we may search the world for that which is beautiful... Unless we have some beauty inside us we will find nothing.

I'm drunk, I know I said I wouldn't be but I am. Here's to alcoholism, here's to playing second fiddle (as opposed to not being in the band at all) Here's to love life and the persuit of happiness.

for_sho

Happy new year, my blog's been neglected but I've been worrying about money and shit like that lately. It's ok, this year's gotten off to a great start. Soon I will be 100% debt free and things will be great.

NYE was great, had a few people over at my studio apartment, it's small but intimate. I'll try to get back to my blog more often.

Christmas was great even though I couldn't spend it with my family, i was still with a wonderful one. I'm looking forward to new year's eve, even though I work until 11pm.

You throw clothes on the floor, you leave the dishes dirty, you never ever take out the trash, there's hair all over the bathroom, and I couldn't love you any more.

Well, my head's staying above water, I can see the shore in the distance and there's a beautiful exotic woman sunbathing on the beach. She seems somehow familiar. Maybe someone I know. Someone I love. Someone I'd swim across the ocean to be near.

I didn't know love like this was possible, I didn't know it could be this real.
A love that couldn't even exists in my dreams, became my reality.